Cru
I just got back from Cru tonight. We sang some songs, Jeff read a bit from the Word, and then we had students come up and share about their friends who were lost. I wrote down a few quotes I thought you would enjoy reading.
“Lauren challenged me to know scripture more.”
“The reason God took her is because He wanted her back. But I feel so selfish because I want her back here.” (about Lauren)
A girl who served as Lauren’s orientation leader last summer said that she asked the students to share 1 thing they wanted the group to know about them. Lauren said, “I want everyone to know that I love Jesus.”
“Somehow when you talked to Lauren, she got to the center of your soul.”
“I was mad at God, like, ‘God, she could have totally rocked this campus for you!’ And then I thought, wow she already has.”
“I hope I can impact in my whole life the number of people Lauren impacted in her short life.”
“Lauren loved to praise God.”
“You don’t have to be Lauren’s good friend to feel like her best friend.”
Mary Read’s parents sent a note to be read to us, and they wanted us to know that she loved CCC and her Cru Bible study, and couldn’t stop thinking about it. They also told a story about her 5 younger siblings, who thought she “hung the moon.” They shared a story about the weekend before she died she was at home, and was sitting on the stairs IM’ing her friends on her laptop. Sitting next to her was her little brother with a toy computer in his lap.
After the students shared, we sang more songs. My favorite moment was as we sung “It is well with my soul.” It was incredible to be among this group of extremely wounded people, worshipping God together, hearing and feeling the pain we all felt in our voices.
“Tho’ Satan should buffet, tho’ trials should come, let this bless’d assurance control, that Christ has regarded my helpless estate and hath shed His own blood for my soul.”
That was when I began to cry, just realizing how incredibly gracious God has been to us, to send Jesus for us, so that even when we die, there is incredible hope that we will be with him. We miss our friends, but we will see them again. And it’s all because of Jesus.
The last verse about Christ’s return was equally powerful. I don’t think I’ve ever so greatly desired Christ’s return as during this experience. I never want to go through another event like this again, but I know I will. I know I will lose more people I love, and will experience pain from another’s sin as well as my own probably many times in my life before the end. That thought just drove me to pray, “Lord, I am begging you to come back soon!” But if He chooses to wait longer, I have the promises of God to trust in through these painful times, that He will never leave us, that nothing can separate us from His love (Romans 8), that goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever(psalm 23), just to name a few. I think often how much I wish this had happened somewhere else. I want my old life back more than anything. But at the same time, since it did happen, I’m so thankful to be here to weather this storm with the people I love here. It was wonderful to worship the Lord tonight with my brothers and sisters at VT.
Thank you for the openness of your updates! What great encouragement the stories have been for my soul this week. I attended Campus Crusade back in my college days in the very early 80’s at a Pennsylvania college and what a difference it made for my walk with the Lord. Knowing that at least 4 of those whose lives were tragically cut short are now standing in His presence brings great comfort. My family has been praying for all of you at VT, but for Crusade in particular because you will be there in the trenches long after the media has packed up their vans and moved on to the next story. And you will be the hands and feet of Jesus to your hurting community. Continue to lean on each other and to draw strength from His mighty Spirit. He will give you all you need. Know that brothers and sisters from around the world, especially those who have been touched by Crusade, are standing in the gap for you.
Comment by Paula Miles — April 20, 2007 @ 9:13 pm
Thanks Cynthia for allowing us to hear from your heart and had even a small glimpse of what you are all going through.
Comment by Brent — April 20, 2007 @ 10:43 am
Thank you. I haven’t been able to feel the pain of this situation yet and it is Friday morning. I wasn’t sure why … too much violence on TV? Have there been so many situations like this now that I no longer react with sadness? Reading your posting, especially the end about the hymn that was sung, brought out my emotions. Praise God for people like your friend. I am sure she has made a HUGE difference in so many lives.
Comment by julie — April 20, 2007 @ 9:53 am
I just can’t even imagaine what you are going through at the school.i am very thankful that Campus Crusad is on the campus.Thanks for being there and helping everyone during this time.
My prayers are with you.
Comment by Tammy — April 20, 2007 @ 9:19 am
As a fellow college student, though not at Virginia Tech, please know that VT’s Campus Crusade is being specifically lifted in prayer daily. I pray that the Lord would both comfort and use each of you… comforting you during this time of unspeakable grief and using you in mighty ways to bring others to the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. Thank you, Cynthia, for honestly sharing your thoughts.
Comment by Joanna — April 20, 2007 @ 5:35 am
Thank you Cynthia for sharing such a heartfelt and real message with us. We might not even be in the same country (we’re in Canada), but our campus also suffered a similar loss earlier this school year, though it wasn’t nearly as traumatic as what you guys have gone through. One of our young Campus/Crusade for Christ students lost his life, not to violence, but to sudden medical causes, and it was a shock to all of us. He had just finished his first year of university with us, and had just started to take up some leadership and lead a Bible study group. He was going to come back to school after taking a semester off to work when this happened.
However, even from such a tragedy, God brought good from it. One important example is how a friend he was starting to date ended up coming to the memorial service we held in place of our weekly meeting, and within a week or two of that and the funeral, one of our senior students ended up leading her to Christ. She is growing in her faith and is now even supporting fellow students who are going on summer project.
Anyways, my point is that God is good, and He will get you guys through this tough time. I hope we can encourage you to keep on trusting in our God, just as you’ve encouraged me to live like and live for students such as Lauren and Mary.
Let me leave you with the first passage that I thought to put on my blog after hearing of our friend’s passing:
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What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died–more than that, who was raised–who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written,
“For your sake we are being killed all the day long;
we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.”
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:31-38 (ESV)
Comment by Paulman — April 20, 2007 @ 4:33 am
Cynthia - thanks for the updates. I, like many others, can’t imagine how emotionally draining this experience has been for you all. I watched Molly’s interviews and I pray that God will give her comfort, peace, and healing. There are so many fellow Christians that are praying for you and your CRU at Virginia Tech and I was glad to hear that you are finding bits of time with each other to take a break from focusing on this event and just “being” with each other. Please let your fellow students and leaders know that your fellow siblings and friends in Christ are raising you up.
God bless you!!
Comment by Eric Litynski — April 20, 2007 @ 3:51 am
Hi Cynthia,
Thanks for your comforting and personal thoughts. Also, for keeping us informed. My wife Donna and I are praying for you and your ministry to all the students. We appreciate all you and the other staff are doing to bring God’s love into this situation!
Blessings from Mpls MN
Comment by Dave Heinrich — April 20, 2007 @ 2:53 am
I want to thank you for posting and sharing what is happening and giving honor to the Lord through this loss. I am in California and grieve over the tragedy, but your postings have allowed me to get closer to what is happening so as to better share in it with you in heart and in prayer, and to be encouraged in the comfort God is providing to all of you as you walk through this together. Trusting His light to illumine the darkness (Ps. 18:28, 32). Much love in Christ, Darlene Fray
Comment by Darlene Fray — April 20, 2007 @ 2:08 am